Log in

No account? Create an account
(HUM 310) Journal #4: Self-Centrism - Abadoss' Mind
(=Links=) - Abadoss' Realm - Facebook (my Facebook profile) - Twitter (@Abadoss) - deviantART (my public art) - YouTube (my public videos) - SoundClick (My Public mp3s) - Conceptual Music Competition - OverClocked ReMix - Young Composers - Iona - Rebecca St. James - Jake Shimabukuro - Troy Keyn - Jessica Meshell - Oregon Symphony - All Classical - Warner Pacific College - Arts & Communication Magnet Academy - Thunder Game Works - Real Life Comics - Penny Arcade - Homestar Runner - Hulu - Craigslist - Encyclopedia of Arda - Uileann Obsession - Weapon Masters - Michael Greenholt - Emerald Twilight - Digital Blasphemy
Mon, Sep. 24th, 2007 03:58 am
(HUM 310) Journal #4: Self-Centrism

How would you describe the relationship between yourself, the religious community with which you most identify, and God?

I'm in a rather precarious position with the church. I grew up a fifth-generation Seventh-Day Adventist, but, throughout my life, have ended up in all sorts of different denominations and ranging from very conservative to very liberal. Very early on, I was actively involved in church ministry - such as prayer teams, drama teams, security, sound tech, etc. - from, at least, age eight or so. What I found, about ten years later, was that I was going to church for the sake of going to church and that I didn't know how to set foot in a church without taking on all sorts of responsibilities. I wasn't going to worship God. I was going to support the church. As such, I am currently on hiatus. In addition to being burnt out by ministry, I also have some personal convictions about the nature of the church, in its current form, that keep me from going.

My relationship with God is also in a precarious position, but for totally different reasons. I am constantly seeking after the depth of God and so I run into obstacles - such as the limits of human understanding, the nature of time and space, etc - that get more difficult to get past the deeper I go. I'm also, very strongly, struggling with the name of "God". In general, I'm even having problems with the idea of putting a name to "God" in the first place. The problem I have is that the names that we associate with our Creator have not always been attributed to Him and Him alone. "God" is a proper name for a Teutonic deity. "Lord" is a translation of Baal. The practice of applying multiple names to a deity is borrowed from pagan practices. What's worse is that the one name that is given by the Creator Himself, is one that we don't know how to properly pronounce anymore and it's not even supposed to be used. Along with a multitude of questions and doubts and seeking things out, that's where I am in my relationship with Him. I still trust him, but I've got questions.

What is the relationship between your community and other communities? How do you view members of those other communities?

As I implied above, I don't really have a religious community with which I identify. I know how I respond to religious communities, but that's not really the same thing. I have many frustrations with the modern churches. My main frustration is that a significant core of them shove pre-packaged Jesuses onto unsuspecting people, assuming that - because they're the correct church - they are guaranteed to turn them into an uber-Christians. It's unrealistic and it disregards those people as people. I believe true evangelism is simply to seek always after God in your personal life and be a good friend and support to those around you, regardless of who they are or where they stand. Let them ask, don't try to sell them some one-size-fits-all doctrine. It's disrespectful.

Why do you identify with your faith community?

I'm having a hard time with this set of questions. My circumstances are such that I don't quite fit into the community that makes up most of Warner. Because of the place that I am at in my faith, I do not identify with any faith community to any degree of significance. I am simply seeking after God and my path has taken me in a slightly different direction.

Current Mood: sleepy sleepy
Current Music: "Fill Her Up" -Sting