Kenneth Edward Keyn (abadoss) wrote,
Kenneth Edward Keyn
abadoss

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Teathered

If the thoughts of my mind and heart could be described in words, then Shakespeare himself would be threatened in his envy. It is as though my heart were teathered to the ground and the taller I try to stand, the farther back to earth I am pulled. A constant gnawing at the core of my being; a place where I had hoped to find the most strength. I am conflicted. I am pained and weary. I am longing and restless and hopeful for change. Yet my paths seem to bring me to my own footprints.

Plainly stated, I am lonely. Socially speaking, I have friends I can hang out with and talk with, but, deep inside me, I am so alone. This emptiness is tearing away at me and I don't know how to solve the problem. In some respects, I hardly know what the problem is; just that it exists.

Maybe I'm way too selective about who I let in. Perhaps in my quest for companionship, I overlook those that would be. It may very well be that I don't really know what it is that I should be looking for. It's probably all true, but I don't think that's the main issue. What is the main issue? Frankly, I don't know anymore. I'm just tired of the pain. I'm tired of feeling broken. I'm tired of feeling alone.
Tags: emotions, friendship, lonely, love, relationships
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