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How to Make a Villa a Home... - Abadoss' Mind
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Mon, Mar. 14th, 2005 01:16 pm
How to Make a Villa a Home...

I had watched Under the Tuscan Sun a while back, although the experience was somewhat interrupted and my concentration disturbed by the event surrounding that night. Anyway, I think I'm starting to pull a lot of things out of that movie. I've been able to draw a lot of similarities between myself and the main character. Granted, I'm not a divorcee... nor a woman... but my world is somewhat shaddered and laying in ruin. At the very least, it's in pieces. I resemble the character at the beginning of the film. Of course, I doubt moving to Tuscany and buying a villa will solve my problems, but there's a few things that I might be able to make of what the character did.

In the movie, the main character (I can't remember the character name, nor the name of the actress) wishes three things of what she could have in her house. She wishes that she would have people to cook for in her large kitchen, she wants to have a wedding in her home, and she wants to have a family live there as well. By the end of the film, she gets all three of her wishes, but not in the way she originally thought to have them. The people she cooks for are those that are there fixing up her villa. The wedding in her house is a young couple that she befriends. The family is her best friend from America, who has a baby. She gets nothing and everything that she wished for. And she's content. (After this point, she then finds a man whom she marries and so goes the story)

What does this mean for me? There are things that I wish for and have wished for throughout my life. How much of it is already fulfilled without my realization? Am I still at the beginning of the movie with all my asperations waiting to be fulfilled? Am I starting over? Is the reel of my life stuck on pause? I don't know. All I can do is wait and see. In the movie, someone else had to point out to the main character that her wishes had been fulfilled. Who is going to point out my fulfilled wishes for me?

But who knows my wishes other than God? Do I even know my own wishes? What are my wishes for my life?

I want to be content in who I am and the person I am becoming.
I want to feel secure in my ability to explore and create music.
I want to feel loved and feel the ability to love.
I want to be married someday.
I want to feel secure in my practices of worship.
I want to be remembered for the quality of a person I am/was.
I want to pursue God without the baggage I carry from my past.
I want to know I've made a positive impact on people.
I want to glorify God in everything I do.
I want to embody my beliefs instead of restrict myself to them.
I want to be successful with my life.
I want my goals to fall in line with what God has in store for me.

I may be an empty villa right now, but I'm hoping that, in time, this villa will be a home. Time will tell and only God knows what my life will look like in the future. I'm so tired of waiting, though. If I didn't understand the importance of patience, I'd wish that all of this could come true now, but I suppose my wishes and desires (which God gave me for a reason) are worth waiting for. If only I knew for how long...

Current Mood: thoughtful thoughtful
Current Music: "Requiem - Kyrie" -Wolfgang Amedeus Mozart