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Iraq... - Abadoss' Mind
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Mon, Mar. 17th, 2003 10:05 pm
Iraq...

Over the past few days, with the build up of impending war with Iraq, I've become fair unnerved... I am 18 and in a liable position to be drafted. I'm hoping that being a full time student makes it easier to get out of it, but still. It's the first time in my life that I am afraid about could happen. Frankly, the first thought in my head is that I don't want ot get drafted because it will disrupt my school. Following right after that is that I either have to choose between taking up arms or morally objecting (which would land me as a medic, engineer, or another type of support unit, which are all walking targets)...

It's scary! My life could possibly be at stake because of the actions of my government... what a world this has become. I've been taught to be an adult all my life, but now that I am legally responsible for myself as a citizen of the United States, I am now faced with the duties of that citizenship. Do I respond out of honor and take up my arms and defend my country or do I flee in terror (though in moral conviction) to avoid war? Were I still in Norway, I would either serve two manditory years in the military or a form of community service, and that would be the entirety of my duties at this point in time... But because I'm an American citizen, I face the threat of being called up, as I am trying to better my life, and go to war.

I am loyal to two entities: My country and my conscience... loyalty is my greatest virtue and now it is split between two opposing forces (equally met). Am I an American, or am I human? Do I follow my allegance or my morals? I have pledged my allegance to this country and its institutions, but I have also pledged myself to the pursuit of moral and spiritual fortitude. Where do I stand? When it was all shades of grey, I could stand wherever I felt I needed to be, but now that it is black and white, yes or no, for or against, I find myself with one foot on each side. The hazy grey is gone.

Is my life worth it for this country? Or is my life worth keeping for morality?

Current Mood: scared scared
Current Music: "Incantation" -djpretzel

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